Quarantine guilt: When self-improvement makes you feel like shit
20. marts 2020
It shouldn’t actually come as much of a surprise that the online generation managed to make a world health crisis about self-improvement and identity questions (and also about staying home, which is so great to see), but I was still caught off guard when I noticed I was feeling quite shitty.
Shittier than one would expect to be while on lockdown, not working and seeing the world go to hell with every refresh on the phone.
It became clear to me that our generation somehow managed to create the narrative that this lockdown is dedicated to self-improvement and performance while sharing said self-improvement and performance with fellow online people. And to a certain degree this sounds amazing. Collective online yoga, closet clean-outs, healthy homemade meals and a focus on the importance of keeping your creativity alive.
The perspective which the well-meaning initiative of inspiring people to #staythefuckhome is missing, is that it is also perfectly fine to not dedicate every single day to the betterment of yourself, your finances, body and culinary skills. This situation fucking sucks. People are losing their lives, family members, jobs and the lucky of us only our sanity of staying inside with absolutely no control over anything.
It’s OK if you don’t feel like doing yoga. It is OK if you don’t start that podcast and become hella famous right now. Fucking cool if you do, but if you don’t. That’s OK.
At the moment we have even more time to stalk each other’s lives and in continuation hereof, also question our own lives and what we are doing. And why we aren’t doing more. Me personally?
Cleaning my apartment more often (which I probably actually should according to the WHO)
Making a business plan for The Whoman Journal and also now jump to the next point
Make The Whoman Journal succeed by figuring out exactly what is missing in the media landscape so I have a backup plan should we all lose our jobs.
Finish the four online courses I’m taking on BOF.
Have more sex.
Get fucking fit.
Learn how to cook.
I am not advocating the complete shutdown of anything active, healthy, creative or financially improving – not at all. For many people this is their way of making the best of an absolute shit situation and keeping calm. And for the rest being both active, healthy and creative is probably a good thing to add to your daily life. As long as you give yourself a break. Both mentally, but also to watch the hell out of Netflix and nap.
I think I am all for using this time to reflect. Using the peace and time to sit down with my thoughts and question some things in my life. Maybe there is actually something that I now have time to do that doesn’t stress me out? Maybe I actually have a dream of starting something of my own that I now have time to do.
What I will not spend my time doing is feeling guilty of not self-improving as much as the next influencer. And that in its self might be how I will improve myself today.